This is me.

This is me.

This is me, why can't you see.
I'm an independent lady who don't rely on man to make the gravy.
Some say I can be intimidating...
what just cause I technically can be referred to as Dr., I have competed in a collegiate sport, I own my house, support my home, and in all ways appear to be grown.
Yeah, I guess it could be misconstrued that I take credit for such accomplishments, let's be honest it's God who did all that.
My travels over sea and land to lend an ear, a word, a hand.
Wouldn't you speak in Spanish if your heart was there,
if you had learned, yet fear,
the mighty acts of God and have a spot for those in need,
why can't you see
this is me.

This is me
the one who loves to run and jump and play,
and swim and bike and hike and fly
Oh if I could fly up in the sky away from eye and ear, above all in the crystal clear
away from the heartache, the judgement, the putting on of shows
all these worldly woes
My God I know you see, for you created me.
You see me as I am.
You made me to love the sun and sweat all day.
My skin gets dark of this I say
thank you for my carefree spirit
i love to dance and sing and who cares if they hear it!
My style, my ways, each one of my days
you created them all.

this is me
don't you see
I'm smart, funny, sarcastic with wit
I'm sporty and nicknamed shorty
by friends who adore me.
The guys - I don't get it
they don't seem to be with it.
I have all these great qualities.

what, is it because I wear cut-off sleeves?
Is my athleticism too much?
am I speaking in Dutch?
Do I come off too strong
by mind, body, or song?
Can't you keep up, let's swim around for miles and bike the trails along the bayou. I'll run if you prefer, basketball, soccer, just say the word.
We'll play hard all day and end with a date.
You pick me up, in your truck.
By the way,
did I say you must meet certain standards...
if I beat you in sport, well let's cut the date short.
You can't figure out how to change a tire?! Come on a girl's got standards!
If I can beat you at games,
show you up, man that's lame.
Be my man
Take my hand
Make the choice
He'll give you your voice.
If you follow His lead
we'll follow Him anywhere
Be it morroco or spain, or somewhere with rain
Be my man,
take my hand,
make the call,
I will fall.

I'll fall hard
my soft side you'll see
the princess inside of me I'll be glad to share
might even do my hair.

Again, this is me
why can't you see
I like short hair and t-shirts.
I go by PT, I got my degree.
My past time is fitness - I have many a witness
I like to drink beer and cheer for my team.
My cooking is little, creativity grand.
I can mow the lawn and caulk the sink.
If you can take all that and still see me.
If you can look underneath the outside appearance you will see that inside I'm still a woman.
I like to go out with make-up in dresses and heels,
Well, like is relative
tolerate is imperative to this narrative
let's be honest...I can and I will
and I do it with skill.
I want to be sexy at times, not so cute.
Want me, desire me, dance just to be near me.
Here I am,
Take my hand,
Be my man.
I know you can see
This is me.

Seeing the stars

Every morning Trilly and I go for our mile walk around the community. It started as a time dedicated to God, a time for me to be still in spirit; yet, I could be a good pet owner and allow the young bitch to expend some energy each day. After lent ended the strolls continued. I mean who could take away a bone from the cutesy starving dog ever, just like who can say no to that enthusiasm that greets me daily at the sound of my alarm. None, no-one, nadie.
Lately though, my mind is on 100,000 different things and my eyes are tired or my body is moving so slow I wonder if we will make it back before dawn, which is crazy seeing as that's another hour and some change away at that point.
I don't like it. The full mind syndrome. I would love to, I need to, I want to be at the place where I'm walking along so in tune with God that there is nothing detestable filling my mind, no shameful or needless thought inhabiting my brain space. Work, dedication, the ability to say no, to take control so that my desires become reality.
Baby steps this I know. I started by taking some time to look At the stars. Just a moment to be reminded of how small I am, how amazingly cool God is and how I would love to save those stars that I saw in the dark nights in California and Indiana and alaska...those same ones, though they appear brightest in Tanzania. It's the small moments, its the few stars ww see...these reminders that I am minescule and yet a princess. I am small and yet a great warrior for the king, one sent out to represent His name... Oh yes this is what I hear when I look at the stars. Thank you Jesus for opening my heart, for allowing me to feel, for getting me through it all . I love you!